lost... even with a compass

The Girl
WHaT u DoN'T NeeD 2 KNoW aBouT Me

AL!a$ * V@N!
thestone addict, always looking for a good nudge in the commons, narcissist, kulot, maganda (bwahahahahahah walang kokontra kanya-kanya tayo hokey?), batty, bookworm, nerdy, extremely allergic to math and physics, webhostess/webmistress (wink, wink), best buddies with raven and google (reeeeeally?), trellix site wrecker (hehehe so always recreating them), trying hard na blogger, middlename is LUNA for lunatic or lukaret, know-it-all in training, duwag na nagtatapang-tapangan and i'm paid to surf the net all day every g*dd*mn day!

AGE * TiMeLe$S (i SToPPeD CouNTiNG WHeN i HiT 18)

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Doodleboard

BR@!N SQueeZe

(sarcasm and cynism galore)

"I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end."
Margaret Thatcher, in Observer April 4, 1989

i don't know who said this but i agree:
"Hell is empty and all the devils are here."

"Lately, I have come to believe that the principle difference between heaven and hell is the company you keep there."
-- Simon Illyan, from A Civil Campaign by L.M. Bujold

from The Devil's Dictionary by the ultimate cynic Ambrose Bierce :
"Patience: a minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue."
"Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one's country."
"Politics: The conduct of public affairs for private advantage."
"Bride, n.: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her."
"Lawyer, n.: One skilled in the circumvention of the law."
"Year, n.: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments."
"Pleasure, n.: The least hateful form of dejection."
"Reverence: the spiritual attitude of a man to a god and a dog to a man."
"Admiration, n.: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves."
"Corporation, n.: An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility."
"Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion."
"Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to."
"Admiration, n.: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves."
"Bore, n.: A person who talks when you wish him to listen."
"Quotation, n.: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another."
"Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum (I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.)"
"Brain, n.: an apparatus with which we think we think."
"Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others."
"Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic."
"Politics, n.: Strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles."
"There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don't know."
"Politeness, n.: The most acceptable hypocrisy."
"Truth: An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance."
"Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence."
"Love, n.: A temporary insanity curable by marriage."
"Egotist, n.: A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me."

from Mark Twain:
"Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest." "Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."
"Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please."
"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."
"Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow."

from Voltaire:
"If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him."

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WHaT'S oN MY SH3LF???

The 8th Commandment by Lawrence Sanders

Read it and loved it. Go ahead and meet Dunk, yeah that's the protagonist's nickie

Lawrence Sander's book: Timothy's Game

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Message: These are just some of the famous break-uplines... Alin ba dito ang narinig o nasabi nyo na? rated PG to ",)

1. "I just realized that I don't want to be touched."-- Never kita hinipuan noh..... baklang to......
2. "I'm confused and I need some time out to find myself!!!"-- Eto flashlight, go look for yourself!
3. "Maybe this is not the right time for us."-- Anak ng tipaklong! anong oras ba dapat?! alas-kwatro?
4. "Di kita maalagaan ng tulad ng ineexpect mo.You deserve someone better. That's not me."-- Bakit sinabi ko bang gusto ko ng YAYA????
5. "Lasing lang ako kagabi. Sorry."-- Eh ako ba lasing? Sino nagsabi sa iyo nagus2 ko ng lasing..... LASINGGERO!
6. "We are too different from each other."-- Bakit anong klaseng ANIMAL ka??

True lies and true lines:
7. "We have to meet other people to see what it's like to be with someone else. I'm giving you that choice. if you come back to me, we'll both be better from having chosen freely."-- HoY! mga palusot mo! break kung ayaw mo na...dami mo pang satsat eh!
8. "Someday, hahanapin kita, when we're both ready. When we don't care about the odds. Kung tayo talaga, tayo rin in the end, di ba?"-- tataguan na kita! kala mo magpapahanap ako!!
9. "I really think that we should breakup." "Why?" "Because I don't know if I still love you."-- Eh ala k nman palang utak kc, how wud u know???...BOBO!
10. "I just realized I haven't had time to walk my dog..."-- Pochang aso yan, buti kung ma-ano mo yan....-- cge pa-ano ka sa aso mo..... an liit kya ng ano nyan.....
11. "It's not you, it's me...-- nyahahaha...... Buti alam mo
12. "Talagang kapatid/kaibigan lang ang turing ko sa'yo, e. Let's keep it that way."-- hinahalikan at nagpapa-ano k pala sa kapatid atkaibigan....... tsk tsk tsk...... INCEST YAN!!!13. "we are not growing anymore."-- IKAW lang no..... try mo kaya mag-GROWIE...... "tatangkad din ako"
14. "I don't have feelings for you anymore."-- Eh pano, gus2 mo lng makipaglaro sa apoy....d nman kc kelangan ng feelings dun...... "URGE" lng pwede na....
15. "i need space..."-- dun ka sa OUTER SPACE!
16. "Mahahanap mo rin ang para sa iyo. Goodluck na lang."-- Umalis alis k nga sa harap ko at baka matiris lng kita........ KUTO!!!
17. "We don't fit in together."-- eh pano, maluwag na.......
18. "sorry kisses, di ka gusto ng mama ko"-- hindi nman sya pakakasalan ko eh, and besides,andami pang ibang nanay sa mundo!!
19. "Sorry, I just realized mas gusto ko sa babae"-- tignan natin kung kanino mas masarap.....pompyang gurl
20. "let's call it QUITS! "-- QUITS mo mukha mo!
21. "Pupunta na ako sa America and I won't come back. Don't follow me there, please."-- kung ayaw mo masundan kita, sa IRAQ ka magpunta.....
22. " Na Realize ko mahal ko pa pala Ex ko/ mas mahal ko pala bestfriend ko"-- Cnong Ex? May pumatol pa pala sayo?
23. " Masyado kang Bata "-- DOM pala ang gusto mo..... sabi ko n nga ba eh......
24. " Kung talagang tayo kahit saang sulok ng mundo magtatagpo tayo"-- next tym we meet, sa burol mo n un or crime scene of ur death perhaps
25. "it was not meant to be ... so honey i am setting you free to look for your destiny"-- u think i see u as my destiny too? dream on.....playmate lng nman tyo di ba?
26. "our time together was beautiful ... but i realized that there are still things i like to discover so ...."-- Pucha, beautiful talaga kc nadiscover ko n almost all kinds of gurls while we were together.......
27. "you are too immature for me..."-- MALAMANG, DOM gus2 mo eh......
28. "It seems that we are not compatible witheach other."-- nde nga, TAO ako, H@**P ka!
29. "Tama na. Ayoko na. "-- eh cnabi ko n yan kahapon eh..... "GAYAGAYA!!!"
30. " i've decided to move on with my life without you... "-- eh ikaw lng nman

***
this is from nicole's friendster

Saturday, April 23, 2005

yesterday, met love at the hotel she and her siblings were at. geez had to walk from pedro gil to a. mabini! never been to manila alone, have always gone there with my cousin or with my sister. it was a long walk and she told me it would be short. typical love, she said that the map seems to make it look like the places are just a "thumb away." oh my god in a scale of what???? anyway, i was so happy to see her... i've been bored to kingdom come here. funny how i actually miss her antics.

she hasn't change in a bit. same old same old love. still hates the sun and wacky as ever. she said they were here to pick up her sister's husband at the airport. since she still has some time to spare, brought her over to see the shoebox room i live in in pasay. managed to drag her to makati. went to glorietta and greenbelt. woke up valdz from his sleep so he could meet us and pay our bill at teriyaki boy which amounted to over php500. he didn't even get to eat the food. since by the time he arrived, we were done with our lunch and the ever gallant valdz (with a little prodding from the both of us and a guilty conscience - go ask love why), took out his envelope and paid for it without even batting an eyelash.

leave it to love to make that day memorable. never a dull moment when you're with her. armed with her usual notoriety, she even managed to play a prank on pres. it was all valdz fault, sinimulan ni valdz tinapos ni love. he texted pres, who by the way is in baguio on his second year at the pma, that i happen to be married. of course he texted me and ask if it's true. of course we both know it isn't. the text message pres sent me was dated april 19 but i didn't see it until yesterday. forgive me pres, cellphones are not allowed on the floor. we leave our phones with the guard and the guards read our messages = ) joke. i showed it to love and promptly decided on a course of action - to take it one level higher (or worst depending on how you see it). she decided "to see the story to it's end."

she told pres that i am not married but living in with someone. and she even made up a name and decided on ryan (only god knows why? - ryan cabrera was probably singing a song then).

pres texted me that a certain chismosa just told him that i have an S.O. named ryan. i asked him "cno chismosa na yan?" and he replied "katabi mo." i replied "si valdz? sure k ba chismosa? bka chismoso? pres, replying in the affirmative on the chismosa, i think sealed it.

love told me to deny the "issue." so i did (i never had a choice - couldn't say no to her, really - or she'll twist my arm - haha just kidding love). there's a saying curiousity kiled the cat - and pres is a very curious cat. pres being the persistent person that he is, texted me again. so supposedly i got pissed and replied with "o ngayn? naniwala ka naman kaagad. cno ba yan chismosa na yan at gigilitan ko. di marunong magtago ng sikreto!" so i'm supposed to be pissed at love who's pissed at pres for letting me know that he knows about my so called secret.

then, love sent pres a message that said: i am furious with her for revealing my secret. that i am not speaking to her at all and that i just told her that she could hotfoot it to her hotel alone. and since she's not familiar around manila - it's a big problem of course. so pres is is of course very guilty.

pres called love asking her if i am royally pissed. and prankster that she is, gave a very convincing story that i am. you should've her seen her. joash never stood a chance. he really fell for it.

love and i have never really had a huge argument (she's a sagittarius). we have always gone on fine. if i'm mad she just let's me be and vice versa. we were just at powerbooks looking up what sign works best with what and our signs are compatible in terms of that (read my blog entry dated february 27, me aries you...).

she told me pres is having an exam that day. i always feel guilty too quickly so i told her "bawiin mo na." but she thought why not let him stew on it for a little bit more. so messages went back and forth between them. pres has not sent me any mesages during that time. he really fell for that cock and bull story - hook, line and sinker!

when pres asked how she's suppose to go back to her hotel, she told him that valdz will take her back there since i am incommunicado. i went home past 7 pm and still haven't told pres that the jokes on him. around 8 pm she texted me that since pres is having an exam she decided to tell him the truth but pres haven't replied yet. so i told love that he's probably trying to calm himself before he replies. and sure enough when pres replied it was in ALL CAPS!

it turns out that he was late for class because of what we did so he was "punished" by being made to clean (i don't know what). and that he was not able to concentrate on his exam because he thought that we HAD A HUGE ARGUMENT! so he promised a resbak! so i told love, i was gonna apologized but i was afraid i was gonna get a message in ALL CAPS! as well. so she said she'll just calm him down and then i can text him hahaha - which i never did since i fell asleep. the nerve -you would say, but i was really tired with all our walking that day and i have to go to work the next day.

she was forwarding me the messages she was getting from pres. she had somehow calmed him down if we take the low caps as an indication. of course, pres is still crying out vengeance. and to that she said "can't wait." oh well, good luck pres! looks like you're gonna need it. you're going up against the master prankster hahaha.

hope to see you again love!! till the next gullible person we meet",> tata!

whoops: my phone's ringing. O oh it's pres. pay back time i guess ;) oh well...

Friday, April 22, 2005

on my way home last thursday, i happen to sit next to this woman who seemed to have a "live" but very quiet conversation all by herself! thank god she wasn't being disruptive or anything. her mouth would open and it seems like she's talking to someone but no words would come out. everyone on the jeep was looking at her like what the??? and they're looking at me like poor girl we hope she doesnt get too violent or anything.

well lucky me, she seems to be so contented with her one way conversation and didn't even invite me to join her. i'd have politely declined or feigned off sleep. she can talk. before the start of our journey, she would even hand off the fare to the driver with "manong bayad daw." i didn't realize she was batty until we were near amorsolo. that's when the one way conversation became too obvious and then she would rub her fight had with her left like she's thinking and then she'd open her mouth and talk to an imaginary person. all i could think of then was just my luck! i spend the whole day listening to nutty customers and now i get to sit right next to Ms. BATTY herself. i felt like i just hit jackpot - sarcasm sarcasm...

Thursday, April 21, 2005

was supposed to meet love today but they can't find any hotel yet just near naia. did my laundry already (thank god) and now am back at the office on full stone mode. just got no class, didn't even have to solve the mathematical equation. thanks to google.

the reason i am here at the office is not to play thestone, ok? come on you have to believe me. ok so that was not the primary reason anyway ",) but to give my pto form to my supe since i have to attach it to my dtr. i took a leave on my birthday, thus the pto. to pass the time on the jeep, i was reading what i wrote in the form. and i notice to my horror that i put the year of my birth on my pto rather than the current year!!!! sh*t so in all probability workforce has a pto applied on e chiow pa uhr nyen suhr ye san drer. if you can figure it out you'll know. ya go learn hmmmm... it's a rap song. not sure if i made the right conversions though.

anyway, that mistake was probably because of too much excitement in anticipation of the day i have to add another year to current number. excitement my fanny! anticipation my ass! off to do some stone research again (what else???) tata!

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

i have a headache...

i shouldn't be complaining since i brought this to myself. went to the webhosting party. last night was a Blast! the night started loudly and ended just as loudly. ask sonny... by the time it ended i was still humming "jumbo hotdog" err... i meant hmmm... that's not it, i think it was some other song... aray???

after the webhosting party, we went to videoke at this place i don't remember the exact name (damn!) but if my memory serves me right it starts with music. it was a night of revelations, what can i say? gwen decided that to remind everyone that she is after all a GuRlLl. pakko (i hope i didn't spell it incorrectly) decided to let it ALL out... (i'm sure anybody who had (dis)illusions about pakko being so quiet and proper were shatterred that night =) cash was simply bowled over by his screa...whoops, sorry slip of the fingers... i meant to say singing skills ",> if you were in that room with us you certainly won't miss a thing. cash can really sing but not as good as i am. NOW that is a joke =) maybe i will, in a million years. man has to go through another evolution before i could acquire that elusive "barbie" voice. sybil let her hair down and decided to give mae rivera a run for her money. nicole showed us her good memory of the abc's (just kidding = ) actually why she's known as the goddess... joi unable to outsing beyonce (missing lyrics!!!!) decided to outdance her instead... Go GurL! rye on the other hand is probably a frustrated opera singer or maybe a ventriloquist in his past life ...... sonny hmmm rather not comment anything about the BORG you know, i still have to send sr's. it was like a walk down memory lane when he started singin - 80's once again. thank god nobody picked i did it my way though - madre mio di ba? and wacks should be hanged...for letting pakko monopolyze the microphone for quite some time. peaches? i am speachless...! the breakfast at tiffany girl. joewhatnow... what can i say william hung errr... ricky martin in the making = > as for me i tried to outsing but nevertheless i was still outsung =) these people seemed to be pros at this than i am. they've just had more practice than i did.

so we sang like the end will come tomorrow. now i know call centers are filled with so many uhm singers just waiting to be discovered?...?? but some treasures are better left buried ...some....

we decided to leave since they're closing already.

in one of my dreams: hic... whooops was that water? hic .... gulped...gulped.... i think i picked up the wrong glass.... slurped...gulped...hic.... too dark in that damn room hic...hic.... ampalaya juice? hic... when did water tastes so g*dd*mn bitter????!!! water please!!!

anyways, crashed at joe's place. nearly blind as a bat, eyes won't open...zzzzzz

next morning crashed darling's place. greeted us with "p***ng *n@ naman O" upon sight. we sort of dragged her out of bed and her beauty sleep...

watched monsters and seven all day. tried my damnedest not to get near any of her dogs which growled everytime i'm on sight. i thought i looked tame...honestly...but her kennels reactions were a wake up call....sigh... very depressed... those were truly depressing movies... tragedies... imagine watching an ugly looking charlize theron make out with a very boyish looking christina ricci. not advisable to watch when you only have less than 6 hours of sleep...

time to pick the champion for tanghalan ng kampyon "webhost manila edition" hmm tsk tsk tsk i'm torn between william hung and aerosmith... however mae rivera is also good. i think i'll keep the winner to myself, just to make sure i also get to keep my head.

***
disclaimer: writer was seriously lacking some sleep and maybe some of her faculties so please try not to take comments above too seriosly

comments? suggestions? violent reactions????... keep them to yourself... if you can't (shrugs), awrighty, POST it HERE!

If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.
-Joan Rivers

Saturday, April 16, 2005

oh MY God! just solved another three puzzles. i solved one puzzle in less than 5 minutes... peanuts! that has never happened to me before....

it's so nice to be happy shalalala..... = )

3 hours later:

2 and a hlaf...errr half hours of OT - been working for more than 12 hours straight - lightheaded and dizzy.... tired.... dead tired

got 5 puzzles today! 32 puzzles in history!!! gloat... gloat... gloat.... ;p
man i'm on the roll.... off to get my sixth. I hope...... yadidadidahdah ...... = )

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

sleepy and bored. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .sleepy and bored

an hour more and i'm outta here. jorel just figured out the enigma puzzle for me . . . . sheeesh... stupid answer really. tsk tsk tsk been right all along just haven't been putting it right. drat!

got a head ache. yet i'm off stoning again. more to go...

Monday, April 11, 2005

if I were a month I would be: April
if I were a day of the week I would be: Friday
if I were a time of day I would be: 9 p.m.
if I were a planet I would be: Mars
if I were a sea animal I would be: dolphin
if I were a direction I would be: South
if I were a piece of furniture I would be: a bed
if I were a sin I would be: Pride
if I were a historical figure I would be: Elizabeth I
if I were a liquid I would be: water
if I were a tree I would be: Narra
if I were a flower/plant I would be: tulip
if I were a kind of weather I would be: rainy
if I were a musical instrument I would be: a guitar
if I were an animal I would be: a rottweiler
if I were a color I would be: blue
if I were a vegetable I would be: broccoli
if I were a sound I would be: ring ring
if I were an element I would be: Fire
if I were a car I would be: c6 or a porsche
if i were a song i would be: soul to squeeze
if I were a movie I would be directed by: Hideo Nakata
if I were a book I would be written by: lawrence sanders
if I were a food I would be: lasagna
if I were a place I would be: hogwarts
if I were a material I would be: flexible
if I were a taste I would be: sweet
if I were a scent I would be: white musk
if I were a word I would be: stone
if I were an object I would be: ankh
if I were a body part I would be: eyes
if I were a facial expression I would be: awed
if I were a cartoon character I would be: sponge bob, kenshin (for anime)
if I were a shape I would be: octagon
if I were a number I would be: 8

Sunday, April 10, 2005

doing thestone again. got 27 puzzles - doing cartwheels all over the place - not ",> solved 4 of them yesterday - daymaker, genesis, the man and the deep. the very last one was a real stumper. got no closes or clevers even if i was already typing the name of the ship. those ***dammed stars don't help at all. i solved it without ever knowing what they stood for. as for daymaker, the answer was already right in front of me and i didn't know do anything about it. too simple i thought... talk about making things difficult for yourself. almost read the man's 7 commentaries good thing i stopped at book 2. sheesh....

doing bunches (thanks to cash for the tip - no results yet, can't marry these things off), exhausted and no going back. am in the stumped zone again. off to google now to do some searches.

Saturday, April 09, 2005

i've always thought august is the unlucky month. but these past two days is about to change my opinion of that. my cousin is about to have an operation to fix his jaw since somebody mashed it with something heavy while he was drunk. my two young cousins broke the windshield of a pajero when one of them remembered to duck while they were throwing stones at each other. believe it or not these two incidents happened all in one day. their mothers were very unhappy, of course. probably ruing the day they were born... they probably wish they had daughters instead. these two aunts of mine all have boys for kids; 4 each = ) mere coincidence?

3:20am yesterday morning, i was awakened with a single word spoken by somebody who seemed to be right behind me. i was half asleep having just changed my sleeping position. i was about to nudge off again when i heard it. it was just one word. it was not that loud; just enough to permeate my sleep-fogged brain. remembering that my cousin was in the hospital, all sorts of scary thoughts were running inside my head. i couldn't sleep again,and since i just used up all of my load i couldn't even call home.

finally around 4am my sister woke up. i told her i was unable to sleep. i was awakened by a shout from person who seemed to be behind me. my sister asked "is it a man's voice?" i said "yeah..." and then she asked again "what did he say?" i go like "HOY!" and she said it's always that one word. i was looking at her and i am getting goosebumps swapping ghost stories with my sister at past 4 in the morning. she told me that she was had been awakened by that same man twice while sleeping alone. always with a HOY!

she asked me if it was so loud and i said no. she said that the first time she heard it, it was so loud she thought there was somebody in the room with her. she felt like the man screamed in front of her face. she even went as far as to opening the door to check if there was someone outside. since there was none, she thought she was dreaming (in the afternoon? - yeah could be). the second time it happened, always a HOY, a man, and loud enough to wake her up from a good afternoon nap. she opened the door again to check if there was somebody outside. NO ONE.

she never told me because she thought she only dreamt it up.
and now that it happened to me, she said "now i know i didn't dream it." how is that suppose to be comforting to me????

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

this is what happened on my birthday:

woke up. got a text message that the pope died 9:37pm rome time. a few minutes later, got stomach cramps. ***$#@&?! my period on my birthday!!!??? can't take these anymore...

got a few more text messages to remind me that i'm getting older. sent a lot of thank you's via sms. wasted half the day replying to people. wasted the other half doing the laundry. what a gruesome way to spend your birthday, right?

went to the market with my sister. bought beef, some white onions. forgot to buy rice. decided to go back tomorrow because the heat is just UNbearable. beyond my level of tolerance. i am positively sure i AM melting.

texted ate ange about how to cook beefsteak without having it come out like adobo. got the reply. cooked it as specified on the text message. beefsteak came out decently. tasted like beefsteak but still far from the cooking prowess of my cousin and her mom. so far my sister and i came out unscathed without any trips to the bathroom or the hospital for that matter.

went to mass in the afternoon. was late for the 4:30 pm mass at greenbelt so had to settle for the 6pm mass. the priest related this story:

unethical though it may seem, two priests were arguing when the pope will die. one said: he's gonna day on saturday because he's a marian devotee. the other said: he's going to pass away on sunday because it's the anniversary of the institution of the divine mercy which was a devotion propagated by his kababayan sister faustina. oh well, God has to step in and pacify the two. the pope died saturday 9:37 pm rome time saturday - marian devotee theory; and it's 3:37 am sunday manila time - divine mercy theory. i guess that pretty much ended their argument.

but, why of all days, it had to happen on my birthday? let me tell you God that it's not a morale booster you know........... come on, i can't be that bad???

i may be taking this the wrong way. looking at the wrong side of the equation. but then i've never been good at math. so that may be it.